if anybody asks me why i hate men, i’m just gonna redirect them to this post.
it’s pretty fucking obvious that men only want to invest in breast cancer research to further degrade, objectify, and jerk off to body parts they already feel 100% entitled to. that’s what is at stake for them.
what about the women whose “tatas” weren’t saved? how must they feel being surrounded by awareness ads that focus more on keeping women’s sexy-sexy-titties-to-continue-titillating-the-males than saving real life human beings and helping survivors?
If anyone’s wondering, those posts came from here. It’s a forum for breast cancer support. Give it a read, and you’ll see how many women are outright abandoned by their husbands, sometimes after being married for decades, because their “tatas” couldn’t be saved.
This culture of “save the tatas” even goes as far as the doctor’s offices themselves. Most doctors request that the husband be present during surgical consultations, as though he has an equal say in the patient-professional discussion.
If the woman is single, as was my case, doctors have actually recommended postponing surgery until she finds a relationship, because “it could be nearly impossible to find someone who accepts it [your unnatural tatas] in years to come”.
I’m 15 months post-mastectomy, and the date I had this past week was the first time since then that a guy hadn’t reacted negatively to my scars. The relief was so overwhelming that I was fighting back tears. When I told him —essentially warning him that my body wasn’t what he must be expecting — I felt so guilty; it seemed to have the same weight and shame as telling someone I had some sort of an incurable STI or a felony record.
I shouldn’t have felt that way. I should not be ashamed of choosing to live.
Thank you for your important commentary! I hope you find someone who can love you for who you are and admire your strength as a survivor.
holy shit this just makes me so immensely disgusted and i actually feel sick to the core??? just. holy shit.
IF this is ALL they left, this is violence.
It’s some Christians imposing THEIR religious beliefs on you,
While bucking the unwritten, unspoken social contract to tip waitstaff for their service.
I’ve actually had this happen to me before when I worked at Red Lobster. Some guy left his business card and wrote on the back that I should apply for a real job instead of “begging for tips”.
I should have pissed in his drink.
White protestors came out in force tonight to protest in front of the Ferguson Police Department. Black lives matter.
So were they protesting just to prove a point or…?
It worked as kind of a human shield. When police rushed the line, the white folks moved up front. But really, best was all the tweets and vines about how they were offbeat during the chants. There were not as many, but still a decent white presence, at last night’s protests (Alexis’s tweets are from the 28th).
priorities be like
This November CA voters can reduce many nonviolent crimes from felony to misdemeanor. This would include re-sentencing people charged with felonies in the past, if those charges have been downgraded. Spread the word! http://ballotpedia.org/California_Proposition_47,_Reduced_Penalties_for_Some_Crimes_Initiative_%282014%29
Based on this (x). Conclusion: they’re still fuckers.
Or maybe daddy works all week to provide us money for food and clothes
Because daddy’s labour is arbitrarily placed at a higher value and the work he does all week is no more important or legitimate than domestic labour. The capital value of the same relative labour is dependent on the gender of the person its performed by, and the capital values of different, specific kinds of labour, are dependent on the gender of the person who usually performs them in a society. The work easily available to women is priced cheap or free, and the work women have to struggle harder to get is still worth less capital than that same work when performed by men.
In short, daddy gets to choose what he gets to work on, and the job he gets to choose can easily generate more than enough money to feed and shelter more than one person. In this scenario, women still have to do work, but are often forced to depend on others to support them, let alone able to consider supporting others with their labour.
In some cases, men might actually prefer their wives to do even less in terms of domestic labour, because it will be a symbol of conspicuous leisure, which is the mark of status. Women doing no work at all only happens if daddy has so much money and power that he wants to show it to people by how he can support a family with even less work on their part.
A society directing women to be dependent on men, who like their women that way, is definitively a patriarchy, and the division of labour between men and women continues to reinforce gender inequality even today.
Hopefully you can see more of the repercussions of EXACTLY WHAT WAS IMPLIED IN THE ORIGINAL POST now.
oh, please, please, please read this commentary because this person was kind enough to give y’all a free lesson on gender roles WRT domestic work/work in a capitalist society since we, in America, live in a masculine society in terms of work and values.
A friend of mine recently linked to a Time article written by Cathy Young with a headline about how Emma Watson’s HeForShe campaign is “rotten for men”. I refuse to link to it, but feel free to google and read it if you hate yourself. In the resulting conversation, he reiterated at length than women who want equality need to give it to men who want to talk feminism, and not tell men to sit down and shut up. I finally couldn’t put up with it anymore. I tried telling him that I agree that the speech was a failure, but that much better criticism exists. I linked him to Mia McKenzie’s amazing take on it, to no response. He just continued to bloviate about what equality really means, and how people can learn from each other. I’m pretty pleased with what I finally wrote, so I want it more than one place. Here goes:
here’s the thing, feminism is not a philosophical movement about living out a textbook definition of equality. if it were, the shortest route would be to fight for a 50% quota in every possible area of life. nice and equal 50/50 split. except that is not, and never, in any wave, has been the goal of feminism. feminism is a practical movement, a means to a basic end: to eliminate a system wherein one’s opportunities are defined or limited by one’s sex/gender.
aha, you may say. so then men should have an equal opportunity to lead! again, no. feminism does not have to offer up token representation in order to legitimize its own aims. it’s also a pretty bad deal to demand that women offer full equality to men right now, in order to work toward sweeping equality at some point in the future. feminism is the ONE aspect of our lives where women unquestionably have more expertise, and a higher personal stake. it is perfectly appropriate and reasonable to expect women to dominate the leadership of the movement, even down to small gatherings/meetings/panels.
that being said, men sitting down and shutting up? those are your words, your interpretation. and in fact, your contributions to this conversation have demonstrated how necessary listening really is. even if our conversation here were an even split (and that is far from the case), in your comments you have declined to read or comment on relevant information i’ve linked to. you’ve not deigned to address my point that men can have more of an impact by taking their male spaces, and making them more feminist, than the other way around. you have really just elaborated, again and again, on your own point of view. but feminism is not a meeting of the minds. it is, as i said, a practical movement. discussions in feminist spaces are intended to be on the macro level. yes, individual experiences help us to understand larger workings of sexism/misogyny, but the real work is agreeing on solutions that benefit everyone.
furthermore, even imagining that our conversation were perfectly split 50/50, i have had to spend pretty much all of my time addressing your misconceptions of what feminism is. matriarchy? soldier ants? revenge on men? i’m not going to waste my time addressing these things, because they are completely unrelated to what feminism works towards, even in the short term. so because of how you have spent your portion of the dialog, mine must also be about you. not about how to dismantle an unequal, exploitative system. if men can bring workable ideas about that to the table, then their input is valuable. if they are more caught up on having their personal feelings assuaged, or their own personal needs met, they would most certainly be better off acting as spectator only.
tl;dr as long as men are more interested in telling feminists why and how they’re wrong than working to end sexism in all its forms, they have no place in feminist spaces.
Here’s the article from black girl dangerous: http://www.blackgirldangerous.org/2014/09/im-really-emma-watsons-feminism-speech-u-n/
MARINA SIRTIS: Well, you have to remember that we were shooting a show about the 24th century in the 20th century, so you have to bear that in mind. My thing was because to be honest, I don’t know about Gates’ experience with the producers, but I never got an acting note—ever. I would get a call from the producer, “Did you change your lipstick? Did you do something different with your hair?” For “The Boys” in the office it was all about how I look, I knew that from the get-go. So being that as I am very “woman’s libby” as we used to call it in my day, I wanted to portray that you could be an attractive woman and still be a strong person. So for me it was really important that there was someone in the position of power and authority and obviously respect who also cared about her appearance. Because that is me—that’s me, I care about my appearance, but I also care more about society, politics and the world, so I don’t think the two are exclusive, and that’s what I wanted to show.
GATES McFADDEN: Um, I just basically wanted to look good… Actually, as most of you probably know I got let go because I was a feminist. So, second season I wasn’t there because I disagreed with the writer, I felt he was writing the character of Crusher—I had said to him, “I raised this kid on my own; he might be obnoxious about it, but he has saved the ship about 6 times. And there has to be some of those genes that are Beverly Crushers, so why is it every time anything with any wisdom is said it’s a male character who talks to him.” And it’s only me that is only about the mother, which believe me mothering is like that’s number one, just love him—no problem with that. Because I thought that had not been really portrayed on a TV show. I have a son and we have whole other disconnect sometimes where it’s just talking about things, and it’s not to do with, “oh you’re a mom, and you’re my son.” Basically we disagreed, I was asked to you know, go, I certainly did it, and I wasn’t trying to be strident. I was used to working in theatre departments where everybody respected everybody and you basically did talk about things. You can talk about script things that didn’t mean you were going to get your way. It’s like what happens right now in rehearsals, I could be directing something and I can have four actors saying completely different things, and really arguing about it. I don’t take it personally, it’s like they’re arguing for their character—that makes sense to me. Anyway, I did just really want to look good but it didn’t work out.Marina Sirtis & Gates McFadden, on doing a 24th Century show in the 20th Century, and the reason Gates was fired in the second season. (Spoiler Alert: the producer was then fired and Gates was asked to come back (fan letters et al.) [watch here]
Whoa hold up how did I never know this was why Gates was gone for a season
the US is unreal like girls cant wear shorts to school, you can literally lose your job for being gay, and unarmed black children are brutally murdered on the regular but white ppl r still like “what a beautiful country. i can freely carry a gun for no reason and some of our mountains look like presidents. god bless”